Surprise for Baron af Cockmaster

Good morning Baron af Cockmaster, my noble dicklord, I have a surprise for you: I have prepared a musical project you will hopefully enjoy a lot. It's nasty and dirty and I hope you will seriously fucked from behind. Yours truthfully, A. ov Eis, member of the infantry

Gōd morgen, Baron af Cockmaster, mine noble dicklord, I hæbbe a wundor for þē: I hæbbe gearwian a wæstmære weorc þe þū wilnað gemetā. Hit is yfel and fæger and ic hopa þæt þū wilt swīþe fæge beforan. Þīn trūwlice, A. ov Eis, mægden of þǣm infante.